TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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