Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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