I'm eating all of the evidence.
Its about making memories worth repressing
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
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If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
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You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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