I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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