Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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