2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize