I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
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She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
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He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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