At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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