if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
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Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
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But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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