I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
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My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
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I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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