ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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