apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I think I just sharted jello shots
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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