I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
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