I seem to have left my pride at pride
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Randomize