when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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