There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize