That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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