i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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