Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's blow job season.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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