make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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