i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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