we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize