Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  No one shows this much boob at breakfast

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  (404): It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast. (1-404): No one shows this much boob at breakfast http://tfl.nu/tvt6
  Replies (7) Good night (3657) Bad night (579) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3

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  (480): gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3 http://tfl.nu/7tkz
  Replies (5) Good night (3150) Bad night (495)
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  (916): View more from California

  So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?

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  (916): So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off? http://tfl.nu/zq3l
  Replies (112) Good night (24095) Bad night (755) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.

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  (937): I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something. http://tfl.nu/k1os
  Replies (22) Good night (514) Bad night (5115) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.

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  (847): Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself. http://tfl.nu/r7wv
  Replies (7) Good night (5687) Bad night (556) Order T-Shirt
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.

  (1-262): View more from Wisconsin

  That's funny. Are they weird looking???

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.

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  (262): There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart. (1-262): That's funny. Are they weird looking??? (262): OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS. http://tfl.nu/egmz
  Replies (38) Good night (8765) Bad night (1216)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.

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  (732): there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts. http://tfl.nu/wlt6
  Replies (48) Good night (7492) Bad night (1960) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox

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  (785): Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox http://tfl.nu/t30w
  Replies (38) Good night (8261) Bad night (919) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms

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  (510): I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms http://tfl.nu/txtg
  Replies (1) Good night (1034) Bad night (2258) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text

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  (503): i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text http://tfl.nu/7lw4
  Replies (5) Good night (4694) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?

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  (845): I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right? http://tfl.nu/k79j
  Replies (2) Good night (3071) Bad night (1118) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...

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  (248): im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend... http://tfl.nu/rj6y
  Replies (4) Good night (2303) Bad night (1009) Order T-Shirt
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night

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  (862): You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night http://tfl.nu/zmqw
  Replies (3) Good night (1636) Bad night (456) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.

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  (917): He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman. http://tfl.nu/emjq
  Replies (5) Good night (2653) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Was I asleep on the ride home?

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.

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  (512): Was I asleep on the ride home? (1-512): Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face. http://tfl.nu/zq2f
  Replies (4) Good night (589) Bad night (328) Order T-Shirt

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