Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
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