Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize