so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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