Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize