Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize