I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I think a kid would responsible me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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