those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
How's work?
Spinning.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize