There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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