I can tuck mytits in my pants
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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