he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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