Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize