For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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