I wanna passion pit in your ass
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize