i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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