Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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