Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
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I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
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its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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