her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Randomize