i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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