out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize