WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
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I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
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I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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