dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize