I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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