Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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