false alarm. still invincible.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize