awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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