okay pat passed out under dana's car
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize