Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize